Before I get started, I would like to say that the Stockholm syndrome itself is a bad thing. You don’t want to have this effect on your ex just to get him/her back.
What I’m going to talk about is something that is partially responsible for what causes the Stockholm syndrome and how you can use this bonding secret to get your ex emotionally attached to you again.
This is one of the most powerful secrets you could use in your plan to get your ex back. It is 100% legal, 100% ethical will actually enjoy the time spent bonding.
For this technique to work though, you would have to have been working on getting back with your ex and you would have to be at the point where you’re already talking to him/her.
This means you would have given your ex the space they asked for and worked on yourself. This isn’t the technique to use if your significant other broke up with you yesterday and the break up is still fresh.
If you need a plan of action to get to this point, T.W. Jackson who recommends this technique in his Magic of Making Up book has a well laid out plan of action that works wonderfully from the moment you hear the words “it’s over”.
What is Stockholm Syndrome?
The Stockholm syndrome is a phenomenon that occurs in hostages and abductees where they appear to express empathy and have positive feelings towards their captors and may even defend their actions.
The phenomenon is also known as capture-bonding and is thought to be irrational because of the dangers and risks experienced by the victims.
The key here is that there is a situation that bonds the victims and their captors usually without either parties knowing that this is occurring. This is the bonding secret that can be used to get your ex back.
Just so that we’re on the same page, I am NOT recommending that you kidnap your ex. You can go to jail for that.
Instead the bonding secret works by playing on the human emotions and is something that most people cannot defend against. Besides if you use this secret the way it was intended, your ex would be very happy and will not complain. As I said before, this technique is 100% ethical in the way it is supposed to be used.
How to Use This Bonding Secret
When you bond with someone you are using a shared experience to create an emotional attachment.
Fathers bond with their sons by going fishing. If the fishing experience was enjoyable and they caught many fish together, son would look forward to going fishing with dad again. They shared an enjoyable experience together that will bring them closer as family.
You can have these same shared experiences that will help to re-bond you with your ex. This happens unconsciously and isn’t detectable or noticed by your ex.
As mentioned before, you would have to have reached the point where you’ve given your ex enough space to let things cool off after the break up.
Knowing this bonding secret alone won’t help by itself. In fact, if you try to use it without first working on yourself and accepting the break up, it could backfire on you and mess things up. You can get a complete plan of action by reading The Magic of Making Up.
Here’s How it Works:
Initially, ask your ex out for coffee or just to meet up and talk. This should only be for a brief time (under half an hour is ideal) and you shouldn’t try to spend more than that time.
This initial meeting is to introduce the new YOU to your ex and to establish trust. There are some rules you should follow that include
- not talking about the relationship at all or what went wrong with it.
- not trying to seduce your ex
- not acting desperate or sad or doing any of these 7 things
- not acting jealous or anything that could potentially cause problems
You’re doing the date to re-establish a trust so that your ex will agree to a second date where you will eventually bond.
After about a week passes from this initial date, you can try to ask your ex out again. If everything went well, your ex may in fact call to set up something. Whichever the case, you can both agree on getting that second and more important date.
On this second date, you’ve already established that you can be trusted, so your ex should be more relaxed and comfortable seeing you again.
Try to set up a fun activity where you can both relax and enjoy the time together. Again, don’t mention the past and if your ex brings it up just smile and say something like “lets just have fun and enjoy the [insert activity here]“.
You would want to set up a couple of mini-dates all packed into this one date where you spend the time enjoying yourselves. Changing locations work very well. It doesn’t have to be expensive (unless you’re Mark Zuckerberg) or appear like you’re trying too hard, it just has to be fun and exciting.
The magic in this technique is that you’re creating an emotionally charged date. If those emotions vary, then this is even better.
For example, the excitement and rush of a roller coaster ride and the joy you experience from laughing at a comedy club all mixed in with the trust she already has for you from the start of the date is a very powerful combination that will emotionally link you and your ex together.
This is a secret that is used by men who are naturals with women (the Don Juans) and is one that works 99% of the time. You’re not begging or trying to force your ex to get to fall in love with you again. You’re just creating an emotional reconnection that will benefit you both.
If you do use this technique successfully, you’ll be well on your way to getting your ex back for good. Just don’t use it by itself and try to follow a set plan.